The invisible mom

It all began to make sense, the blank stares, the lack of response, the way one
of the kids will walk into the room while I'm on the phone and ask to be taken
to the store.

Inside I'm thinking, 'Can't you see I'm on the phone?' Obviously, not.
No one can see if I'm on the phone, or cooking, or sweeping the
floor, or even standing on my head in the corner, because no one can see me at
all.
I'm invisible.. The invisible Mom. Some days I am only a pair of hands, nothing
more: Can you fix this? Can you tie this? & Can you open this?
Some days I'm not a pair of hands; I'm not even a human being. I'm a clock to ask,
'What time is it?' I'm a satellite guide to answer, 'What number is the Disney Channel?' I'm a car to order, 'Right around 5:30, please.'

I was certain that these were the hands that once held books and the eyes that
studied history and the mind that graduated summa cum laude - but now they had
disappeared into the peanut butter, never to be seen again. She's going; she's going;
she is gone!
One night, a group of us were having dinner, celebrating the return of a friend
from England
...
Janice had just gotten back from a fabulous trip, and she was going
on and on about the hotel she stayed in.
I was sitting there, looking around at the others all put together
so well. It was hard not to compare and feel sorry for myself.
I was feeling pretty pathetic, when Janice turned to me with a
beautifully wrapped package, and said, 'I brought you this.'

It was a book on the great cathedrals of Europe
..
I wasn't exactly sure why she'd given it to me until I read her
inscription:

'To Charlotte ,
with admiration for the greatness of what you are building when no one sees.'

In the days ahead I would read - no, devour - the book. And I would
discover what would become for me, four life-changing truths, after which I
could pattern my work:

No one can say who built the great cathedrals - we have no record
of their names.
These builders gave their whole lives for a work they would never
see finished. They made great sacrifices and expected no credit.
The passion of their building was fueled by their faith that the eyes of God saw everything.
A legendary story in the book told of a rich man
who came to visit the cathedral while it was being built, and he saw a workman
carving a tiny bird on the inside of a beam. He was puzzled and asked
the man, 'Why are you spending so much time carving that bird into a beam that
will be covered by the roof? No one will ever see it.' And the workman
replied, 'Because God sees.'
I closed the book, feeling the missing piece fall into place.

It was almost as if I heard God whispering to me, 'I see you,
Charlotte . I see the sacrifices you make every day, even when no one around you
does. No act of kindness you've
done, no sequin you've sewn on, no cupcake you've baked, is too small for me to
notice and smile over. You are building a great cathedral, but you can't see
right now what it will become..'
At times, my invisibility feels like an affliction. But it is not a disease that is erasing my life. It is the cure for the disease of my own self-centeredness. It is the antidote to my strong, stubborn pride.
I keep the right perspective when I see myself as a great builder. As one of the people who show up at a job that
they will never see finished, to work on something that their name will never
be on.
The writer of the book went so far as to say that
no cathedrals could ever be built in our lifetime because there are so few
people willing to sacrifice to that degree.

When I really think about it, I don't want my son to tell the friend he's
bringing home from college for Thanksgiving,
'My Mom gets up at 4 in the morning and bakes homemade pies, and then she hand
bastes a turkey for three hours and presses all the linens for the
table.' That would mean I'd built a shrine or a monument to myself. I
just want him to want to come home. And then, if there is anything more to
say to his friend, to add, 'you're gonna love it there.'
As mothers, we are building great cathedrals. We cannot be seen if we're doing
it right.
And one day, it is very possible that the world
will marvel, not only at what we have built, but at the beauty that has been
added to the world by the sacrifices of invisible women.

Great Job, MOM!

Share this with all the Invisible Moms you
know...I just did.